Happy New Year!
I'm so excited about 2022 and what it has to offer the ImmiGreat community. When I settled on this topic, I couldn't help thinking that it wouldn't have been my post choice 5 years ago.
Think way less positive and more doomsday. So, what changed? My confidence levels. While every day is a good day to commit to changing your life for the better, January seems to inspire a stronger burst of energy and optimism. That’s why my 1st post of the year is about a key player in accomplishing any goals you set this year - Confidence.
And yes. Confidence is hackable. Here's how:
I don't work out as much as I would like but I can't deny the confidence boost I get when I'm exercising regularly. I feel better about myself and more excited about taking chances and saying yes to new opportunities. I feel less anxious and less inclined to negativity. Things that cause us to self-sabotage or talk ourselves out of elevation.
By setting fitness goals and striving to meet them you exercise your self-hype muscles. This has helped me truly understand that I’m capable and that I can achieve anything if I stick with it long enough.
Close your windows
I’m glad that I lived in a time when distractions were way more contained than they are now. They were relegated to the neighbor-couple who squabbled constantly (I could silence them by closing my windows) The TV (it had set program times) Friends inviting me to hangout (my mom's firm NO, curfew and massive amounts of study & chores)
Now I’m the one saying the firm No, reviewing my To-Do list and generally checking on how my actions affect me and the people I love. So basically adulting, lol
Now we have to deal with a different set of distractions but when we don’t figure out how to avoid them, they rob us of time, and eventually lead us to doubt ourselves and our choices. Spending time consuming what others create or procrastinating our own actions is ridiculously easy because these distractions keep you from quality time that should be spent reviewing your feelings, actions, and desires. Staying in touch with yourself, reviewing your accomplishments and acknowledging your emotions are all essentials to developing self-confidence.
Invest in your confidence
Where do you feel lacking?
- Are you scared of dining in public? Take etiquette classes.
Do you find it impossible to string coherent words together when strangers are present? - - Get a speaking/presentation coach or start with joining Toastmasters where you get a friendly community and a mentor to guide you.
Has your confidence taken hits in your current work position, yet you can’t quit because you’re scared you won’t get a better position?
– You may need a life or career coach to help you. I’ve learned to never underestimate the importance of expert help. I'm an avid supporter of the Toastmaster program and I always recommend it to new migrants or expatriates and anyone struggling with speaking up in meetings or making presentations.
Generally, people don’t feel confident when they are not well prepared. The good news is that these feelings of anxiety reduce drastically when we put in practice time.
When you over-prepare, there is no way you can be unprepared. And with those feelings of having all your i’s dotted and t’s crossed, your self-confidence skyrockets.
Set realistic goals
Another easy way to boost your confidence is by breaking goals up into smaller, bite-sized pieces. Trying to tackle too much at once makes it easier to get overwhelmed and quit or feeling discouraged because it takes too long to hit our milestones. Setting a goal to buy a house in 6 months will seem daunting if I have no savings at all but imagine what a difference it would make if I labelled it a long-term goal and also set short term goals like Get a financial health review. Save $2000 monthly. Negotiate a 45% raise.
By breaking your goals up, not only does it make achieving your overall goal easier, but it also increases the chances of small victories that encourage you to keep going. This is great for your self-confidence.
See the person you want to be
Visualization is an incredible tool that’s used by most successful people. And no, it’s not stupid. It’s basically allowing yourself to believe it is possible. Stretching your imagination to accommodate that level of you by seeing yourself in it. Why else would actors like Jared Leto and Meryl Streep still practice Method acting, a range of training and rehearsal techniques that have been around since the 1920s?
It has been proven that the more we can see ourselves in our desired state, the better our chances of achieving it. Successful people have confessed to once driving around top-tier neighborhoods, browsing fancy stores and doing other "weird stuff" to get comfortable with things that seemed way out of their reach just so they could visualize themselves living that way. They wanted to feel like they deserved success too.
Spend time everyday visualizing yourself living your accomplished goals.
Review Your accomplishments
Another way to help curb negative self-talk is to remember our past successes. Many people dwell on their failures and totally dismiss their accomplishments. I’ve noticed a typical way to raise children in African households was to downplay their successes to keep the child “humble” and to prevent jealousy from others towards that child. The negative result of this is that said child finds it hard (nearly impossible) to feel a true sense of accomplishment.
Life’s experiences can shake anyone’s confidence, but you can get back on your feet and get your self-confidence back by practicing any of these tips I’ve shared.
Did I leave anything out? Please share any other helpful tips to help a reader gain their self-confidence back.
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